The tantric approach offers us a stimulating vision of eroticism, as well as the keys to a fuller, freer sex life...
The body is seen as a wonderful tool, at our disposal to refine and transform the consciousness. All that is required is to be careful as to what it can achieve and how quickly. Therefore, exercises are not rules or recipes to follow, but methods to adopt between two partners, a receptive state to "what is." The key is to be patient, attentive and present, and let the sensations and feelings of pleasure grow, vary, circulate and be experienced.
Your minds should be as open as possible, free from negative thoughts and concerns of everyday life. Communication between partners is equally important and the relationship will thus improve.
Having a full and satisfying relationship requires a certain mental and physical preparation:
Prepare for this by using some rituals.
Today we are driven to consumption and we want everything right here and right now. If you wish to acquire a Tantric mind, then you will need to wait for the right moment and prepare for this moment properly.
- The Setting: Arrange your setting as a "sacred space" according to your preference,with a few accessories such as incense, draped fabrics, soft lighting, candles. Attention should be paid as to where the tantric love act will take place. This should be like a small sanctuary, where all the chosen elements are selected to promote concentration, calmness and well-being.
- The Body: Careful cleanliness and personal care and lightly perfuming of the body with lotions, perfumes, etc. without going too overboard. Everything should be subtle.
- Other Aspects: Take your partner into consideration: using your eyes, let your partner feel your availability and openness. Sharpen and stimulate your 5 senses by simply observing your partner. This kind of contact allows the transition from slow movements to more sensual preliminary stages (caresses, love games) with full mutual enjoyment. Tantric rituals of touching are very important, the body of your partner can be enjoyed through administering massage, applying oils or creams. Even at the stage of the sexual relations, certain principles are fundamental, in order to experience these to the full.
The 4 basic foundations
Breathing: Think about breathing calmly and deeply throughout the practice. Your breathing should always be deep, calm and relaxed.
Relaxation: Keep your body relaxed and give yourself up to the sensations. Many minor sexual failures (loss of erection, frigidity, vaginal dryness, etc.) then naturally disappear when relaxation and deep breathing are present during the sexual act.
Detachment: Do not expect anything, do not actively seek orgasm and do everything just for the experience, to see where it leads you. Practice this detachment, in a relaxed state, with no particular intention.
Experience everything in the here and now. Let yourself indulge in the pleasures without imagining anything in particular. Be present. Just give yourself up to the experience with your partner.
Prolonging the pleasure
According to Tantra, ejaculation is considered as a loss of vital essence, and it is limited to procreation. The object is to maintain the state close to orgasm for as long as possible, always delaying it. Identify the moment before orgasm, then relax by slowing your breathing or changing position, to stop the waves of pleasure from happening. The man can thus achieve orgasm without ejaculating, which helps prolong the sexual act. These slow and non-orgasmic relations aim to open the way to accessing the divine and learning to control sexual energy.
Each partner must help the other in their mastery of the practice. By mastering the build up to orgasm, the pleasure will be only more intense.
The advice from WomensDestiny : Tantric Sex is a learning process, giving yourself up to the sensual experience which advocates an opening of the spiritual senses of both you and your partner, with no taboos or limits.
Meditation can also be a useful tool to learn how to control your breath and maintain calm over excitement.
