If there is ever a time when words really matter, it is during a breakup. The difficulty is therefore one of finding a language of truth, while avoiding the pitfalls of lies and of devastating revelations.
We have all experienced a “breakup”.
One in two or three couples end up in divorce, and that does not even count the breakup of common-law couples.
Three types of break-ups can be distinguished: being left, deciding to leave the other person, or leaving by mutual agreement.
Already, the word " Breakup" in itself is very significant. Even more so, because it is often comparable to "abandonment," a common injury for most of us. This decision is often exceedingly difficult to make, because the target of this toxic behavior, whether male or female, tends to feel very depressed.
In other cases, the breakup can be a matter of psychological survival. Patience will be your best ally in welcoming in this phase of your life, sprinkled with humor and with scorn. Above all, don't isolate yourself and do ask for help. There are qualified professionals. Appropriate coaching can reveal your inner resources. It will help you bring to light your behavior, which can very often position you as "Savior" or "Saved".
Roles that you take on subconsciously and that which lead you to have expectations, which are not fulfilled by the other person. Recurring patterns in a breakup.
And where is Love in all of this?
This existential and eternal question is a beautiful quest. Deep down, isn't that your reason for living? Finding love is there, right in front of you, like a gift waiting to be picked up.
Steps to take:
Write down all the feelings you have for your ex-partner.
Observing your emotions, experiencing them in full awareness rather than burying them, is an essential step to the process. Then we have to go through a process of "Relationship Grieving," which begins with all the emotions, the attached beliefs, denial, fear and anger, pity, resentment and then finally acceptance. It is quite normal to go through a phase of great sadness. All of this is normal and human, and can turn into self-rebirth. We are alchemists. You just have to decide to be this!
Faced with a romantic breakup, each person reacts in their own way. Don't you think it is time to love yourself? This experience will transform your life and increase your self-esteem, in order to become aware of your needs and your limits, which evolve over time.
Day after day, you will become a kind and grateful person. This beautiful energy will be attractive when you are around the right person. There really are not any rules in a romantic relationship, even if society says otherwise. (living together, getting married, having children…). Do as your happiness dictates, knowing that nothing should be taken for granted. Breaking up will be just a “word” to you that will no longer scare you. Having your emotional independence, your way of seeing the world and your fellow human beings will have evolved, your eyes will shine with a soothing light. Serenity will shine within you!
Keep a positive attitude. Let us be indulgent with ourselves. What if caring begins, above all, with oneself? Love, respect, and communication will now mark your life path in your relationships. Most of the sources of conflict that arise in a relationship can be resolved and the relationship can be reconstructed.
And if you can't get over your break up and can only think of your ex, then consider how to get a second chance with them and lern how to get your ex back!